Good morning! Hope you have coffee in hand and a smile on your face, because I’m about to wipe it off.

K-Go showed me an article in the NY Times that circles around a new “innovation” for the ass…And when I say “ass”, I’m suggesting multiple meanings. For one, here is the article. In case there are some reading this that don’t feel like clicking the link, the article is about a new public toilet that is being tested in NYC. It’s supposedly the Rolls Royce of toilets and it’s created by this guy. For 25¢ you can shit and enjoy the pot with a 15 min self-cleaning experience, that according to its creator, was developed with homeless people in mind. So I guess the homeless people walking around NYC, who have a spare quarter of course, would find their fancy in this super-toilet.

Right.

Also stated within the article are the statistics of cost, water usage, and how the test run went. Here they are:

“In the first five days of operation, 443 people paid 25 cents each to use the public bathroom at Madison Avenue and 23rd Street, consuming at least 7,531 gallons of water and generating $110.75 in revenue. (Cemusa, the Spanish conglomerate that operates the public toilet, makes its money more through advertising than via the quarters — sort of how New York City gets more parking revenue from tickets than from meters.)”

So in five short days, NYC wasted 7,500 gallons of water washing people’s asses and only made $110.75? Granted, it is said above that it’s the ads that are drawing in the cash, but let’s revert back to Mr. Douglas Ladson’s original intent. How many quarters of that $110.75 came from homeless people? Yeah, I wonder too. Once again, cash takes precedence over being eco-friendly. Gotta love America.

I will say, as I said to K-Go, that I have to commend Ladson for all his hardwork on this toilet. He obviously is very aware of the fact that many people (maybe even most) could give a SHIT (pun intended) about our consumption of natural resources. He literally made shitting a flashy show that will trick people into thinking that expelling waste can actually be a cool thing to do, rather than a normal, necessary daily act.

It seems as though there is an upswing of major companies that are targeting the Modern Idiot and making out like bandits. Take the people who bought the iPod Touch for $299. They got a whopping 8GB of music. WOOHOO. Yet they passed up on 80GB for $50 less.

Steve Jobs, I applaud you. You know better than the rest of us that you could up the price for the Touch because we, consumers of America, are still just a hop, skip, and a jump away from the primates we evolved from. Kudos.

Maybe if Apple and Ladson joined up… you could buy a toilet that washes our asses for 20 min while listening to your favorite Britney song for $5 on the subway.

Fuck.